ALL IS MERRY AND BRIGHT

Family hanging out.

During my family's Christmas celebration this past Thursday I was reminded that the

"Universe gives us everything we need." 

As I reminisce on that day, a number of images weave themselves in my mind's eye:

- My Mom kneading, buttering and baking Serbian "pogaчa" (a sort of pastry-like bread) that morning

My brother-in-law and eldest brother getting the holiday meal ready!

- Arriving at my sister's house to half a dozen people opening the door, smiling and wishing us a "Merry Christmas"

- My five nephews' and nieces' anticipation and sweet impatience to start opening the gifts

- Pouring our homemade eggnog for the family, the sound of clinking glasses, everyone saying "cheers!" and "жiveli!", and the subsequent "oohs" and "aahs" at the deliciousness 

- Seeing my SO (significant other) running around the backyard, playing frisbee with the kids, his Mom and the dog 

Frisbee time!

- Getting to sit at the "children's table/the coolest/funnest table" for the holiday lunch

- The absolute mayhem of paper tearing, endless smiles, "thank yous", and hugs and kisses that ensued with the gift opening extravaganza 

- My sister-in-law and niece asking me in their animated way if my SO and I "REALLY did make the Nutella" that was part of our gift for everyone

- Going on a walk with my youngest nephew, niece, oldest brother and SO

- The whole family hanging out in the living room by the fire, while Skyping with relatives in Serbia

- Watching my youngest niece play with a new toy she really, really liked and wanted to show everyone

- My youngest nephew having the grandest time playing with one of the empty holiday bags 

My littlest nephew found the best gift! 

The entire day was made up of so many beautifully simple and precious moments that speak to the beauty and wonder of families and the quality time we spend together. To me and my SO, this is the essence of holidays. 

Merry everything!

~Modern Akhmatova

JOYOUS GIFT MAKING

As I returned home from a brisk afternoon bike ride earlier today and opened the door to our home, I was embraced by the exquisite smell of fresh baked dough. My significant other (SO) shouted from the kitchen "Just pulled the pizza out of the oven." I took off layers of winter clothes and walked over to him, smiled and said "There is truly nothing better in winter time than coming home to the smell of fresh baked dough." 

I truly meant this and it's because this is how I grew up in Serbia with my Mom's incredible cooking that made our small home so warm, cozy and loving. Ah, the sweet memories of childhood.

But they don't have to remain in our childhood. 

Last year, right around this time, my SO and I embarked on an epic "baking extravaganza." We actually started planning as early as October, but spent five weekends leading up to Christmas baking 60 DOZEN COOKIES (740 cookies to be exact). :) We really wanted to make our own gifts for our loved ones and found inspiration in what Grandma Bernie used to do. She is my SO's 94-year old grandma who used to bake 100 DOZEN COOKIES every Christmas! We tested a number of recipes before settling on the ones we loved the most (complete list of cookies is at the end of the blog post), both old and new, and those that we grew up on, like Grandma Bernie's Banana-Chip bars and my Mom's Vanilice, Baklava, and Strudla. These were going to make up the cookie baskets that we would then give to our loved ones in special holiday tins that Grandma Bernie used to use to store her cookies. 

Vanilice

Banana-Chip bar

Strudla

With our recipes in place and a Google spreadsheet to track all of the ingredients we headed to COSTCO on our two bikes and a "child" trailer. We biked 6 miles to COSTCO, filled our three bike baskets and trailer with 100+ lbs of groceries. SO biked back while pulling the trailer with 90+ lbs of groceries home. We even made a rest stop at a park on our way back and ended up having such a fun and relaxing time. No need to fight over parking spots at the mall or get stuck in traffic! We loved it :). 

Our awesome wheels and "child" carrier :)

So we didn't quite plan for everything, like where and how we would store 740 cookies for an entire month leading up to Christmas. CRAIGSLIST to the rescue! We bought a giant chest freezer and the problem was solved! :)

Throughout the month we listened to lots and lots of Christmas music (e.g. Diana Krall, Frank Sinatra, She & Him, and not so classy (SO's choice of course) Aqua Teen Hunger Force) danced, enjoyed the snow, drank, took pictures, and enjoyed every moment of baking for our family and friends. 

At the time, we hoped that our efforts would continue grandma Bernie's tradition in the family for years to come, and while we had an awesome time doing this last year and will probably do this again later on in our lives, we decided to do something a little bit more low key this year! To be revealed...after Christmas of course. Hint: our kitchen is already starting to smell SO good! ;)

Happy Joyous DIY Gift Making!

~Modern Akhmatova

COOKIES WE MADE:

1. Sour Cream Raisin Bar 

• A sweet and sour juxtaposition of raisins in sour cream sandwiched in an oatmeal crust. 

2. Hungarian Raspberry Pastry

• A superb combination of raspberry jam and walnuts set in whipped egg whites baked on a shortbread crust. 

3. Banana Chip Bar

• A delicious combination of chocolate and banana flavors, and when properly baked is still a bit moist.

4. Strudla

• A classic Serbian dessert. A delicious combination of sweet poppy seeds and raisins rolled into a doughy crust.

5. Vanilice

• One of the most common sweet delights from Serbia. A delightful combination of sweet dough with tart apricot jam and a hint of lemon in every bite.

6. Baklava

• The one and only! "Walnut" filling surrounded by the flaky, yet moist filo dough topped with lemon syrup.

7. Apple Gouda Oatmeal Cookie

• Not a particularly sweet cookie. It combines the sweetness of apples and raisins with strong olive oil and cheese flavors.

8. Peanut Butter Cookie

• A classic peanut butter cookie. Included homemade peanut butter and a sugar coated finish to give it a delicate crunch. Some sported cross hatches while others were dotted with chocolate chips.

9. Vegan Thumbprint Cookie

• A nutty cookie, with a hint of maple flavor and topped with apricot jam. 

A YEAR IN!

At this time last year, we had instituted for the first time our annual "No Spending November" activity for the month. We had just started experimenting with our new-found lifestyle ideas: spending less and saving more; driving less and biking more; running around less and prioritizing quality time with each other and our  loved ones; and eating home-cooked food instead of processed and restaurant food. Here we are a year later in another "No Spending November" month and it's exciting to look back at how much we've done over the past year to turn our dreams into reality.

We continue to be committed to this lifestyle and we're finding out what works best for us and our preferences. There is a lot of information out there about "alternative/green/sustainable/etc." lifestyles. This is great, but every person, couple, and family has to figure out what works best for them, because you won't be able to do everything that you come across, that you like, that everyone else is doing, and in the same way that they're doing it.

What is more, most of the blogs and books we've read about this suggest that lifestyle changes, as with anything really, work best when you embark on the journey in a gradual and experimental sort of way. After all, there is a lot of self-inquiry that has to take place in order to change one's habits for the long term, and this takes time, energy, and commitment. Thus, prioritizing too many great ideas at any one time is probably not going to work out in the long run.

And so here we are, a year into our "lifestyle-change" journey and I'm delighted and proud to say that we've done a lot to align our daily life with the four aspirations I listed at the beginning of this blog:

Saving is the key to financial success.

We've achieved a 75% savings rate, primarily because we've been brutally honest with each other about our spending habits. Using the Mint software and Google spreadsheets, we sit down at the end of each month to review, discuss and analyze our spending and savings activities during the past month.  During these discussions we figure out whether there is anything that can be cut out in the future and plan for upcoming expenses that are unusual in nature. This has been a very powerful and revealing exercise for us over the past year.

Our bikes and trailer in front
of our old apartment.

Biking, walking, trains, and metro are our main forms of transportation. Seven months into our experiment, we sold my car (for more details check out this blog post). At that point we had already moved closer to my SO's work, so he could bike to work, and I negotiated with my company to work from home full-time. Then, nine months into our experiment we sold my SO's truck, and are now left with a Volkswagen Golf that we only use on special occasions or when we need to go somewhere that we can't get to easily with our bikes or public transportation. We see ourselves getting rid of this car too, once we decide where we want to settle down.

SO and my nephew playing music
in a Baltimore park.

Prioritizing quality time and experiences over things is our daily mantra. One of the primary reasons we embarked on this lifestyle exploration is that we were fed up with the constant accumulation of stuff and the way consumerism wreaks havoc on people's sense of presence and joy within everyday life. We observed people around us and ourselves running around in cars from one thing to the next, constantly busy and stressed out, and shopping without end. So we decided to STOP and SLOW DOWN.

• Nowadays, we don't plan to do anything after work during the work week that requires us to drive anywhere. We also try to have at least one or two weekends at home in any given month. When we do make plans to go somewhere for the weekend, we try to have only one engagement per day. 
• When it comes to holidays and any sort of gift-giving tradition, we either make a gift ourselves (i.e., arts and crafts, food, etc.) or arrange for an outing/meaningful experience with the person.  We apply these rules to our own relationship, as well, and it's been wonderful each and every day.

We cook 99% of our food and compost almost all of our food waste. Both SO and I care a lot about our health, because we can't imagine living without being physically and mentally active pretty much all the time. In addition to wanting to make sure we ate nutritious and delicious food, we realized over the last year that we needed to get smart about buying food, because organic and locally-sourced can be pretty expensive (ever tried shopping at a farmer's market, Whole Foods or MOM's Organic Market?). The more we researched this the more we realized that our food consumption habits directly impacted our environment. As a result, we've tried to buy as much food as possible in bulk and unpackaged, and then whatever food waste we do have has gone into our compost tumbler (for details check out earlier blog posts on composting, landfill waste, and grocery tracking).

It's really inspiring to look back and realize how much we've been able to accomplish in just one year. I'm excited for all that we'll discover and do over the next year as we continue to experiment with our crazy lifestyle.

Happy Living!

~Modern Akhmatova

CELEBRATE!

"The more you praise and celebrate life, the more there is in life to celebrate." - Oprah Winfrey

I'd like to dedicate this post to celebrating our life throughout the month of October!

My almost done
magical tree costume. :)

• First, how fun, creative, and exhilarating this Halloween has been for us! We planned and made our costumes from June to the beginning of October. We spent countless weekends sourcing and playing with all sorts of stuff while making our costumes. I was a magical tree and SO was a pyro magician. Basically, I was one giant, glowing, and eclectic tree, while SO set stuff on fire with propane gas. We also planned and choreographed a live performance for the family friends we visit in upstate NY every Halloween. We picked the music, choreographed the show, and practiced a number of times. All  of this anticipation and preparation led to a memorable and fantastic experience with our family friends who also had a surprise for us. They unveiled a ginormous spaceship in their garage, and played all kinds of awesome music while aliens, zombies and wolverines danced at the top of their driveway.

Beautiful fall leaves that I
found on one of the trails.

• Second, how wonderful it was to be camping and hiking in the Shenandoah National Park during autumn! After our long weekend in upstate NY, we worked 3 days and then left for a long weekend in Virginia. SO's parents came along too, since this camping trip has been a family tradition for them for many, many years. We hiked, cooked and hung out at the campsite, shared all sorts of stories, read together side by side in the tent, and had the pleasure to see and hear the one and only Charlie Maddox sing at the Big Meadows Lodge. SO has seen Maddox perform almost every year since he was a baby. Watching him and his parents sing all of Charlie's songs in unison was a beautiful and really fun experience. 

• Third, that I succeed in making creamed spinach taste just like my Mom's! Creamed spinach is one of my all-time favorite foods, but that's really only true if it comes out of my Mom's kitchen. So finally, I decided I was going to try to learn how to make it and it turned out great! It was so satisfying to breathe in the familiar aromas of cooked spinach and garlic, and to realize I could continue the Serbian recipe tradition! 

"Lifetime" compost tumbler

• Forth, we got a big, awesome COMPOST TUMBLER!! This is super exciting for us. In my earlier post on composting a few months back, I described the time-consuming and not-so-green way we were going about composting our kitchen scraps at the time. For a while my SO and I have been discussing getting a composter of our own. So we did some research about what works best for apartment dwellers, read customer reviews on Amazon about different compost bins and tumblers, and decided we were going to get one by November 1st. Between last month and a week ago, I had been tracking local ads on craigslist. Finally one showed up that looked good and voila, it's now sitting on our balcony. Loving it!

• And lastly, toasting to the 20 year anniversary of the California Desert Protection Act! The Joshua Tree National Park, Death Valley National Park, and the Mojave National Preserve were established in the California desert as a result of this Act that was signed on October 31, 1994.

And now I'd like turn to the whole idea of celebrating holidays and traditions, and why my SO and I decided to make up our own.  

So much of what we celebrate is prescribed by the society and culture we happen to live in. Most people follow along because they get a day off work, believe in (materialist) reciprocity, and/or because everyone else is doing it. Having realized all this, and primarily because we've come to despise the "biggest sham holiday of them all" - Xmas, my SO and I wanted to start celebrating things that we actually felt joyous about and that made a difference in our lives. 

Source

Along the way we also realized that in order to keep peace with the family we needed to make the best of all the consumerism-driven events such as Xmas and birthdays. That said, we've adapted by making homemade foods and crafts for Xmas gifts, and treating our friends and family with quality experiences. 

While we can't wait for the day when we no longer have to deal with the religious and retail tyranny of Xmas, we will go along to keep family peace by treating it like a family breakfast that we bring homemade treats to for our loved ones. 

On the other hand, we're big fans of Thanksgiving, which will get its own post at the end of this month. As far as we're concerned, and everyone we've every talked to about this, Thanksgiving is the best "official" holiday ever. 

Happy Celebrating!

~Modern Akhmatova

Autumn Joys

"Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns." - George Eliot (a.k.a. Mary Ann Evans)

Ah, the autumn breeze and warm colors have arrived. To celebrate the wonders and the comforts of the new season we decided to go bouldering this past weekend in the Coopers Rock State Forest near Morgantown, WV. Three other couples joined us on this spontaneous adventure. The park is three hours away from where we live, so we joined up with one of the couples to share the ride, reduce our carbon footprint, and enjoy each other's company (and their dog Milo :)).

During our drive there and back, I couldn't help but stare out the window, mesmerized by the scenery whizzing past us. We were surrounded by endless hills and fields of intermingled red, green, yellow, orange, and light brown canopies. What a beautiful sight accompanied with myriad moments of silent inspiration.

Coopers Rock offers a great concentration of high quality boulder problems within day trip range of Baltimore and the Washington D.C. area. Two of the couples we went with are veteran climbers. SO and I, along with the other couple we drove with, are less experienced climbers, but we could still hold our own and have loads of fun bouldering. That's the beauty of climbing, especially in the outdoors; it's a very chill sport with a gorgeous setting to boot.

The rock and the act of climbing are also good reminders to meditate and the benefits of clearing one's head. As humans, we assign meaning to the world around us and nature reminds us that our conception of meaning is often inadequate and unnecessary, especially if one desires to truly be present in nature. To climb well and "be one with the rock", an almost meditative state of mind is required. The  moment you start to think too much, your body tenses up and you're pretty much done climbing. To me, at its best, bouldering is like ballet on rock.

Me walking on the trail on our way
to the next bouldering project
(that's a crash pad on my back)

One of my favorite moments of the entire trip was making food over the two fires we had going (in large part thanks to my SO who loves anything and everything to do with fire :)), drinking wine, sharing stories and hanging out together under the starry sky. The next morning was just as sweet. SO and I were the last to wake up, and as I walked from our tent to the picnic tables, everyone else was already eating breakfast and chatting. I realized afterwards just how much I enjoy hanging out at a campsite, making food and spending quality time with others. To me, there is something instantly relaxing and quietly joyous about a campsite.

Shortly after breakfast, everyone packed up and we were off to the rocks for some more bouldering action. By the time 3pm arrived, we were all desperately sore, yet so grateful for having spent the weekend together surrounded by natural beauty and pushing ourselves and one another physically. My new outlook on being young is that we are blessed with strong bodies and should use them to fully experience the natural world as much as we can, while we can!

SO coming down
after a successful climb!

SO and I plan to return to the gorgeous autumn woods in two weeks again. This time it will be a 3-day camping trip in the Shenandoah National Park with his parents, who are also avid hikers, campers, and outdoor adventurers!

Happy trails!
~Modern Akhmatova

IMAGINATIVE LIVING

“Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction” - Antoine de Saint-Exupery

At the beginning of each calendar year, I spend an hour or two writing my 1, 5, and 10 year visions. The key to do this is to write it in present tense, as if today is taking place in 2015, 2019 and 2024. It can be about anything that's taking place in my life at that time (i.e., relationships, family, job, hobbies, health, achievements, etc.). I started doing this in 2010 after attending a workshop that was led by the CEO of the company where I still work. She explained that this is something she does every year and how fascinating it is to return to them years later and discover their accuracy.

This past weekend I sat down to review all of the visions I had written over the past 4 years, as well as the 1, 5, and 10 year goals my SO and I started to write together in 2012. He didn't take them seriously at first, but has since become a fan of this simple visioning act; so much so that we now discuss our goals and dreams on a quarterly and sometimes monthly basis. The goals differ from the visions, because they are lists of specific actions we want to take to achieve our visions. 

Source

This simple and easy activity has done wonders for our communication and growth as a couple. This format creates a fun and safe space for us to discuss some serious topics (i.e., lifestyle preferences, finances, marriage, kids, etc.). It has also enabled us to be vulnerable and imaginative by opening up about our innermost hopes and dreams. In this way, we are able to voice and acknowledge our individual desires, and then discuss them in the context of our life together. As a result, we get to:

• know ourselves and each other better;
• imagine and plan what we need to do to make our dreams come true; and lastly,
• hold ourselves and each other accountable on an ongoing basis.

I'm currently compiling all of our visions and goals into one notebook, so that we can more easily review what we've written over the years, and reflect upon our progress thus far.

Happy imaginative and actionable living!

~Modern Akhmatova

THE SWEETEST PART OF MY HEART

You are wondrous
I see you in the origins of snow-capped mountains, river valleys, and wild flowers.

You are the sweetest part of my heart.

My being opens up in the presence of your understated beauty, honest joy and silent wisdom.

~Modern Akhmatova